Undesirable effects come with the negative use of the word ‘gay’
When I talked to my boyfriend about an annoying situation a few weeks ago, I was careful not to use the word “gay” pejoratively. My boyfriend once argued that the pejorative use of the word is the reason young gay boys are afraid to come out. Furthermore, its use implies that being gay is bad.
Quite frankly, he has a point. Our generation has been misusing “gay” as a general term of disparagement. While political correctness seems cumbersome at times, it’s necessary.
What’s necessary, though, is not always easy. For example, I can’t help when aggravating situations get to me and a slip of the tongue often results in f-bombs or calling someone/something/someplace gay.
Take my ongoing predicament with the office of financial aid. When they failed to issue me my $1,600 refund to buy books because of some office limbo, I couldn’t help but say, “What the (expletive)? What kind of gay (expletive) is that?!” (Now, I’m not saying they’re doing a bad job; they’re just a little slow and understandably so.)
In unfortunate or stressful situations, you need words with a kick, usually that word ending in “ck” does the trick. And that’s fine, but using words like gay at the expense of others is careless.
I didn’t know what the word gay meant until roughly sixth grade. Until then, though, I had heard the word hundreds of times. Through context clues, I learned its implied meaning. Whenever it was used, I knew it meant something bad. If someone was gay, you didn’t want to be that person. If something was gay, you didn’t want to have it. Or if some place was gay, you didn’t want to be there.
That’s why I never told anyone about my orientation in middle school. The idea of being publicly “gay” was unappealing, to say the least.
Perhaps that’s why I feel guilty sometimes when I use the word in that way. I know by doing so, I’m only perpetuating the negative connotation and aiding the same people who made me feel like a pariah in middle school.
So while some people will argue that they don’t mean to use the word to put down gay people, they don’t understand the impact of their words. To understand that impact, you have to first understand language.
Language is an immense and powerful tool. It fuels movements. It diffuses violence. Language can inspire and it can hurt.
My being gay is neither an excuse nor a reason as to why I shouldn’t use the word “gay” in that manner. In fact, I join the millions of people who continue to misuse the word and, in turn, affect the millions of struggling teenagers trying to find their place. I’m struggling myself because I must consider the following question in regards to the evolving etymology of the word “gay:” Should language change first and then people will follow, or should people’s perception change first and then language will follow?
Ricardo Lopez is an assistant design editor for The Nevada Sagebrush. He can be reached at rlopez@nevadasagebrush.com.
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February 12th, 2008 at 1:07 pm
I understand you being angry about the negative association with the word gay, such as “Chem lab is so Gay!” But I have one major problem here. You’re upset about the “misuse” of the word gay, but I argue that the word gay has been transformed over time as our society has also changed over time. Remember that the word gay had an original meaning to describe hapiness or positive emotion. It was only through the change in society and lifestyles that the word became associated with homosexuality. It wasn’t a problem then, but since the word has recently picked up a sense of negative emotion the homosexual comunity wants to through the red flag. Bottom line, meanings change and cultures change. There is nothing you can do to change the meaning just because a word doesnt fall in your favor.
February 12th, 2008 at 9:35 pm
Jordan,
I never said I was angry at the use of the word. I am guilty of using it, too. If you read the column more carefully, you’d see how I avoided using the word with my boyfriend, and how I used it to describe the financial aid office. — But this is a nit-picky point about your comment, and it’s quite irrelevant.
The point of my column is that the negative connotation the word has taken on affects gay teenagers. When gay equals bad, it transcends meanings. Chem lab is gay. Which means chem lab is stupid, bad, pointless, etc. I again made the point in the column how that affect me in middle school, and I’m one of millions of teenagers who went through the same thing.
And yes, language changes as times and society changes. I am quite aware considering I am studying linguistics, and I am an English major. But different groups are incredibly sensitive to pejorative words, slurs, and sayings.
The only thing I am pointing out– not exactly arguing– is for people to think about the effect of language.
Lastly, there is something people can do to change the meaning of a word. How else did the word change from meaning “happy” to meaning something like “bad?” Someone had to change the meaning, now didn’t they?
February 17th, 2008 at 3:04 pm
There are so many words with multiple meanings. However, this is one that needs to be carefully weighed as society attempts to get passed its ignorance on orientation.