By Ryan Suppe
Every October, movie theaters from coast to coast are flooded with new “horror films.” Our generation sees an average of 30-50 horror movies released each year, most of them during this month. This very precise timing is not because studios want to get their movies out before the Oscars deadline. Instead people like to watch scary movies around Halloween, and they’re willing to sacrifice quality for jump scares and ghost stories.
Unfortunately, horror movies have become eerily similar to the experience of going to a haunted house or watching supernatural videos on YouTube. You watch it for the sole purpose of being scared. Last week, the sixth installment of the “Paranormal Activity” series was released.
The scariest part of the movie for me is that as of Oct. 26, it grossed more than double its budget in revenue at the box office. The first Paranormal Activity was quite enough, yet they continue to be made. I don’t understand. You can get the same garbage on “Ghost Hunters” for free!
October is about pretty leaves, pumpkin carving, football and ABC Family’s “13 Nights of Halloween.”
Don’t be tricked into thinking you have to go see a crappy scary movie, that’s what summer blockbusters are for. The only good movie to ever come out in October is “Halloween”. And I’ll give it a free pass for pandering because it’s literally called “Halloween”.
“The Exorcist” (December 26, 1973), “The Amityville Horror” (July 27, 1979) and “Poltergeist” (June 4, 1982) are great horror films that weren’t made in two weeks just to earn a quick buck in October.
These are the movies I’ll be watching at home with three locks on my front door and blankets half-covering my face.
This year, instead of going to the theater to see a scary movie, stay home and watch a classic. Go to Recycled Records and pick one up for five bucks or find one on Netflix. Don’t waste your money on “Paranormal Activity 6” or 7 or 15 because it’s not going to be any good, I promise.
Or, if you want to see something REALLY scary, watch a documentary about the island of garbage humans have created in the middle of the Pacific Ocean twice the size of Texas. Now that’s scary!
Here’s some of my favorite stuff to watch around Halloween (if it’s marked with a * it’s on Netflix!):
The Exorcist (1973), The Shining (1980), The Blair Witch Project (1999), Scream * (1996), The Grudge (2004), The Conjuring (2013), Rosemary’s Baby * (1968), 28 Days Later (2002), The Omen * (1976), The Ring (2002), “The Twilight Zone” TV series * (1959-1964)
Not so scary:
The Goonies (1985), Monster House (2006), Donnie Darko (2001), Paranorman (2012), Hocus Pocus (1993), Night of the Living Dead (1968), The Addams Family * (1993), Beetlejuice (1988), Shaun of the Dead (2004), Tower of Terror (1997)