Trick-or-treat, trick-or-treat, give me something good to eat. It’s that time of year again. As the pumpkin spice lattes are made by the dozens, it seems our Instagram feeds simultaneously flush with hundreds of costume pics.
What do they say? With great power comes great responsibility? Something like that. As you know, you have the power to make the ever-so-crucial decision- ‘What am I going to dress up as this Halloween?’
Trust me, I too have encountered my fair share of costume conundrums. But after a few carefully crafted Halloween garb choices, I’m basically an expert.
So here are my two cents on this years Halloweens do’s and don’ts:
Do leave the cat ears at home. I get it, people. The cat ears are an easy, go-to costume. I mean for 99 cents you have a costume. Right? No wrong. Instead of throwing on the makeshift cat ear headband, throw together a costume using things you have around your house. It isn’t that difficult people. Throw on a white button up, some black jeans and invest in a jet black wig with front bangs. Ta-dah! Now you’re Mia Wallace from “Pulp Fiction.” And if you want to get really crazy you can even hold a stog and snag a tube of fake blood and recreate the famous nose bleed.
Don’t let your girlfriend or boyfriend coerce you into a costume you are not about. If you needed to be told by an outside source, you don’t have to be the dalmatian to her Cruella Deville. When you really think about it, there were 101 of them. Guys, you can do better than that. So, unless you’re justifiably in the doghouse, you can always say no. Ladies, same goes for you. Don’t let your man make you do the “Blue’s Clues” thing. Don’t let him convince you to be Blue while he’s sitting all sound in his thinking chair! Couples, instead maybe try an equal approach. Some good options could be Darla and Alfalfa, Michael Jackson and his monkey Bubbles, Austin Powers and Foxy Cleopatra, Veronica Corningstone and Ron Burgandy or simply, the Wayne’s World Duo.
Do try to leave the slutty nurse/firefighter/police officer/etc. costumes at home. I’m not sure who you’re arresting with those pink fuzzy handcuffs. The XXX movie production company called. They want their prop back. Come on, people, you can do better than this. No fires are going to be fought when your costume is a 2-foot wide piece of flimsy fabric. Halloween or not, talk about bad burns. Instead of sporting one of these overplayed personas, shoot for something more original or current! These cop-out costumes are so 2007. All I am saying is originality trumps the “sexy” blue collar costume any day. Instead, try something cutesy like a TBT Cher Horowitz (“Clueless” is a classic). Or try something more relevant like one of the thousands of Kardashian personas. You could even channel your inner Beyonce and play tribute to the ever-so-notable Lemonade video.
A big Halloween don’t is choosing a costume in poor taste. Recently, a costume distributing website, Costumeish, received some serious backlash for their costume based on Kim Kardashian’s Paris robbery. As many people know, Kardashian’s Paris hotel room was broken into. She was held at gunpoint and robbed of millions of dollars in jewelry. A lot of things are funny. Will Ferrell movies, Saturday Night Live, the 2016 Presidential election- now those things are funny. Armed robbery, not so much. On another serious note, actor Seth Myers said it best: “Don’t wear blackface. The risk just isn’t worth the reward. Think of the happiest you’ve ever been in a good Halloween costume, and then think of the saddest you’ve ever been when everyone called you a racist. That’s like breaking your sobriety for an Amstel Light. It’s not worth it. Just don’t do it.” Black face is nothing more than a symbol to further a type of fallacy that black people are an inferior race. So for everyone that says it is “just Halloween” and “people can’t take a joke” unfortunately, you can’t deny blackface being an emblem for oppression. Let’s just all agree we are leaving the distasteful costumes at home this Halloween.
Above all, do have fun with your Halloween costume. Whether you’re dressing as the cast of “That 70s Show” with your closest friends or flying solo in a totally original costume, make sure you’re having fun with it. Remember, Halloween is meant to be spooky, spunky, festive and fun. Don’t be afraid to get decked out and be different. Go big or go home. But really, if you are wearing cat ears, just go home.
Ali Schultz studies journalism. She can be reached at firstname.lastname@example.org and on Twitter @NevadaSagebrush.