One of the most monumental experiences of college is having to live with other people, which can either be enlightening or traumatic (or both). It can be difficult trying to reconcile rules and boundaries with other people who have been living a specific way for the first 18 years of their lives. There will invariably be some growing pains. But, in order to make you feel better about any awkward interactions you have had with your roommates, I have curated a list of reader-submitted roommate horror stories.
“One time my roommate vomited all over our bathroom, which was shared between six women, and left it there for three days though we repeatedly begged her to clean it up.”
Emmy T. Phobia
“So this one time I go to sleep at like 11:30 p.m., and my roommate Matt is in the kitchen making dinner. I wake up at like 3 in the morning to the horrible smell of burning food. I try to go back to sleep but it smells so bad. I go out into the kitchen into a cloud of smoke to see black chicken on the stove. I turn it off and go back to sleep. It smells really bad. The next morning he texts the group saying, wtf is that smell. And I say it was your chicken, asshole.”
“My roommate left his pocket pussy on the kitchen counter.”
“One day my roommate Katie texts the group saying, ‘Hey is it ok with you guys if my dad stays in the house for a couple nights?’ And so her dad stays in our house without her, just by himself.”
“My roommate was mad at me, so he put a red shirt into my laundry while I was doing white clothes and it tie-dyed everything.”
“I was hanging out with one of my roommates and a friend, with one of my other roommates in the next room. I went to the bathroom, washed my hands and saw him watching something on his iPad through the crack in the door. When I looked closer I saw he was watching a video of a cam girl in a skimpy school girl outfit with the door open! I motion for my roommate and friend to come see, when the cam girl takes off her top and starts dancing. We all returned to our room and silently scream-laughed into our pillows.”
-Igbaf Bosconovitch Yelchin
“My roommate tags me in anti-Muslim Facebook posts.”
If you live in the dorms or share a house/apartment with some friends, just try to be courteous and communicate. Take heed from these stories: if you’re going to vomit all over the bathroom clean it up, keep your sex toys in an undisclosed location, express your emotions and don’t take petty revenge, and close the door when you are surfing the darker recesses of the internet. Oh, and do your dishes. Just…do them.