When you order wings at any fine establishment, they’ll usually ask you if you want bone-in or boneless. The true wing connoisseur goes for the bone-in wings, the way they were meant to be, while the amateur goes for chicken nuggets coated in buffalo sauce and calls them boneless wings. Boneless wings shouldn’t exist and are just sauce-coated chicken nuggets.
Have you ever seen a boneless chicken? I’m not talking about those “mutant chickens” that Kentucky Fried Chicken was rumored to have. But have you ever seen a chicken, a full-blown bird, with no bones? You haven’t, because they don’t exist. There’s no reason why boneless “chicken wings” should exist because boneless chickens don’t exist. Boneless wings are an abomination to chicken dishes.
If you want boneless wings, go pick up some chicken nuggets and drizzle some sauce over them. But don’t be all proud and mighty like you’re eating chicken wings. Chicken wings aren’t easy to eat. They’re messy, sometimes spicy and require a level of dedication not often found with other foods. That’s why you’re rewarded with deliciousness when you choose to take the time to eat chicken wings. They take hard work and dedication to get every ounce of protein out of the wing, but it is well worth it. The existence of chicken wings goes down in history as the perfect sports-watching food, best beer companion and one of the most versatile sauce-soaking foods to exist. Their creation changed America.
Bone-in wings used to have more hype because they were less expensive than boneless wings, but the price difference isn’t as drastic as it once was. Unless you’re going to specific restaurants on specific days (Buffalo Wild Wings, Wingstop) where they have deals on boneless wings, there isn’t a reason why you should order boneless wings.
Chicken nuggets are fantastic in their own right. They’re crunchy, savory and can be dipped in so many sauces. Nuggets are a fine and acceptable part of food culture. They definitely belong in the realm of “Best Comfort Food.” I appreciate a good chicken nugget now and then, but when I want chicken wings, I’m going to get bone-in wings (flats only) and call it a day.
You can’t try and claim that chicken nuggets and boneless chicken wings are different things. I’m not saying you’re a terrible person for ordering boneless chicken wings, but you’re not eating wings you’re eating sauced up nuggets.
Opinions expressed in The Nevada Sagebrush are solely those of the author and do not necessarily express the views of The Sagebrush or its staff. Jacey Gonzalez is a student at the University of Nevada and studies journalism. She can be reached at firstname.lastname@example.org and on Twitter @NevadaSagebrush.