2 Comments | May. 6, 2008

“Senioritis.”

It’s changed.
This university. This city.

“Senioritis.”

My column at The Nevada Sagebrush has been a zany one.

There’s a reason Sandy and Danny sang “Summer Nights” in “Grease:” Singing about winter nights amid all those “Doo wops” and “Sha la las” just wouldn’t sound right.

Dear City of Las Vegas,
Let’s be honest, can I be honest? Things just aren’t working out—we both knew this was coming, so don’t act as if you’re surprised. It’s time to be real.

To close out the 2008 spring semester I thought I’d give you something to look forward to: spring semester 2009.

Ah, campaign season: A glorious time when old rich people prance around on television and tell us why they are exactly what this country needs.

“In our brief national history we have shot four of our presidents, worried five of them to death, impeached one and hounded another out of office. And when all else fails, we hold an election and assassinate their character.”

Illustration by Winter Carrera
Story by Jordan C. Butler 

Some puddles, when stomped in, never clear up. The silt mingles with the water and nothing is clear until the water disappears.

“Jesus didn’t know how to party, anyway.”

I walk around the Quad with a lantern and cry incessantly: “University of Nevada tradition is dead. UN tradition remains dead. And we have killed it.”

Western Nevada is a seismic zone similar to Los Angeles and we’re due for a 6.0 or greater earthquake.

Two semesters came and went faster than I had anticipated.

• I paid $100 to cuddle with a prostitute
• Wolf Pack signs three recruits
• Nevada gets bid to NCAA Softball Championships
• McPherson ready for NCAA tournament
• Wolf Pack wins with walk-off home run
• Merritt resigns
• Nevada advances in Softball Championships
• Nevada losses in NCAA Regional championship
• Gervasoni resigns after five seasons with Pack
• Scurry wins first road game with Wolf Pack

• I paid $100 to cuddle with a prostitute
• Game Review: Master Chief and Arbiter ‘finish the fight’ and don’t disappoint
• Wolf Pack signs three recruits
• Nevada gets bid to NCAA Softball Championships
• McPherson ready for NCAA tournament
• Wolf Pack wins with walk-off home run
• Merritt resigns
• Nevada advances in Softball Championships
• Nevada losses in NCAA Regional championship
• Gervasoni resigns after five seasons with Pack

• July 2008
• June 2008
• May 2008
• April 2008
• March 2008
• February 2008
• January 2008
• December 2007
• November 2007
• October 2007
• September 2007
• August 2007