Okay, listen, I don’t know who needs to hear this (probably a lot of you), but as the title implies, the love of your life is NOT waiting for you like a knight in shining armor at a downtown Reno bar.

Heartbreaking to hear, I know, but the tequila and strobe lights in Tonic are lying to you.
When you’re making heart-eyes across the bar top at some genuine 4/10 (on a good day) and you lift your arm up to lean on the bar for a better look, let the regurgitated vodka shot you just put your elbow in be a reminder that this isn’t fairytale land.
This is the Dirty R. Chances are either you, or whoever you were flirting with while the worst karaoke to “Red Solo Cup” (rest in peace Toby Keith) played in the back, are throwing up outside of 5 Star Saloon before numbers are even exchanged.
Not to mention, those same eyes were being made at a minimum of three other people that night.
Now take the time to reflect and see if this situation is really relevant to you. Here is a little check-list. If you check more than one box, then sorry… I’m right, and this applies to you.
- Are you the type to fall in love quickly?
- Did you have one too many green tea shots?
- Is he even that cute? Like really?
- Same question as above but now picture him in good lighting.
If you passed this check-list, congrats, you are part of the one percent that might truly find love in a bar, or you’re still in denial.




